Mayhem and Stardust

We are the proud parents of, amongst others, Jig, who has a handsome collection of diagnoses (ADHD, AD, FASD) which probably mean nothing and a generous smattering of fairy dust which probably counts for everything. School was a huge challenge and so we decided, probably rashly, to move to the country and home educate him. No medication, no 'support', chickens, space, a farm on the doorstep and a beach nearby. What could possibly go wrong?

PUP

A friend of mine calls what I have just had as “Periodic Unschoolers Panic Disorder”. It could just as easily be called PAP (adoptive parents will know where I am going with this) The symptoms are; a sickening lurch in the pit of your stomach when you think about the responsibility you have shouldered pretty much alone, unreasonable outbursts in response to fairly ordinary childhood issues due almost entirely to an over investment in another persons every waking thought, word and deed, a sudden and uncharacteristic addiction to anything screen based that will buy you just one more minute of quiet and a financial investment in parenting and education advice resources that would otherwise fund a small county.

The treatments for PUP disorder include; allowing yourself to seriously consider putting your child back into school without allowing any sense of failure or loss, listening to friends with differing opinions, disregarding most of the advice you just bought making no decision at all until you feel as though your feet are on more solid ground and taking a few moments every day to look into your children’s eyes, properly, in the way that you last did when you were feeding them.  Turning an eyeball to eyeball conflict into an honest look into each others eyes is a new trick for us.  I recommend it.

I am not yet out of the woods with this disorder but am certainly off life support.  We have home ed plans for September at least and, for now, have planned no further.

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One thought on “PUP

  1. I came across your post from WASO and am blown away. I have read many many blogs as we start the adoption journey and they’re all great and insightful, but what is so uplifting about your posts is that you seem to use every challenge and trial to learn something, either about Jig in many cases, but often about yourself. You avoid negativity and self-pity, although the temptation must often be absolutely over-whelming, and you seem to just ‘keep walking’. It’s really very inspiring for someone a little overwhelmed sometimes by the sheer levels of trauma and pain out there, and whilst I am sure it’s only part of the picture of your life, it’s a lovely thing.

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